Two of our kids were on the high school Swim/Dive Team. I loved watching them and celebrating their commitment. Allow me to set the stage: these athletes were at the pool by 5:15 AM most mornings during their season. They returned to the pool after school several days a week for a second practice. They sacrificed sleep, time with friends, and the chance to “chill as teenagers.” Why? What drove them?
Culture.
There is ritual and tradition embedded within this team, including a commitment to teamwork, unwavering support, and a discipline to be “better together.”
I witnessed countless examples of leadership within the team by student athletes sharing insights and giving guidance. These kids elevated each other by openly sharing observations and feedback. One fantastic example of teamwork was best displayed with our divers’ actions when someone learned a new dive.
When a diver learns a new dive, he or she will most likely have a few excruciatingly painful attempts (think belly flop/back flop), which are often embarrassing. Before the dive was attempted, teammates on our team got into the water. Those in the pool splashed to disrupt the water so that when the diver hit the water, the surface was disrupted, thus reducing impact. This is powerful to observe. (I know some pools can produce bubbles to produce this effect, but our pool did not. This was powerful to watch).
I cannot fully articulate how amazing it is to watch an athlete receive team support like this.
Not only that, but the team celebrated all dives and would erupt in thunderous applause when a diver had a total miss. This reaction changed what might have been both painful and embarrassing into a celebration of a brave attempt. Most divers can’t help but smile when their team is cheering for them after a flop.
Imagine yourself as that diver; instead of being humiliated by the “miss” or tolerating utter silence, the attempt is celebrated.
This also plays out in a student athlete’s mental fitness work. Interestingly, we begin teaching our children about physical fitness at a young age, it’s even part of our educational curriculum. We don’t have a standardized framework implemented to teach them about mental fitness.
Our youngest child tried swimming (after years spent at the pool cheering for her brothers!) but decided Lacrosse was her sport. She recently sustained an injury that required her to wear a boot and avoid weight-bearing and contact activities for a few months. At the first practice from the sidelines, I watched her spiral into negative self-talk. She started dwelling on how her teammates would be further ahead of her due to her limitations in practicing. There is truth to that. In this scenario, I saw amazing leadership from her coaches who understand the mental impact of an injury and worked with her through her “return to play” plan.
This injury gave her the experience to focus on what was within her control. For example, it was within her power to practice daily stick skills, to show up for practice with a positive attitude, to listen to the coach to understand the purpose of the drills and be prepared to jump in once cleared. This experience gave her a comparative advantage. Not fun, by any means. Most athletes spend a lot of time working on their physical game, but many don’t pause to work on their mental game. This was an opportunity for us to work with our student-athlete (along with her coach) on how she would develop the skills to recover quickly from disappointment (a bad call, a hard loss, etc.). This is not easy work. This work takes time, commitment, and focus to develop awareness and command your mind to change the thought pattern over negative self-talk (saboteurs).
The list is long but key themes rise when I reflect on leadership lessons from my student-athletes. The top takeaways for me so far have been:
- Show up, even when practice is early and you want to sleep, even when you will spend most of it from the sidelines watching. Just show up.
- Practice matters. Physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. (How you practice is how you will perform on game day.)
- Recognize the work required and be embrace the journey. (The parent partnership with the coach goes beyond driving to sports; it reinforces the right messages and mindset.)
- Keep trying; everyone has an “off” day (Those who thrive persist with what is possible.)
- Laughter can change the situation. (The divers laughing with each other after a belly flop or my daughter’s teammates joking about her crazy tan line from her boot; levity carries power.)
I see so many leadership parallels within these observations. Imagine how different each day would be if everyone identified ways to positively “disrupt the water” for each other in tough situations.
To be successful when it counts, you must put in time and commit to practice. To practice effectively, you must be surrounded by trusted teammates and coaches who believe in you and give genuine feedback. To build trust, you must set an example to disrupt the water. It’s your time. Jump in.
Hershman Associates, LLC 